


Stacey's Announcement

by Lefaym



Category: Baby-Sitters Club - Ann M Martin
Genre: Community: lgbtfest, Gen
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2010-06-08
Updated: 2010-06-08
Packaged: 2017-10-09 23:58:05
Rating: General Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,091
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/92970
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/Lefaym/pseuds/Lefaym
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>Why will nobody believe Stacey when she tells them that she's bi?</p>
            </blockquote>





	Stacey's Announcement

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks to Lionessvalenti for the beta, the US-picking and the title suggestion.
> 
> This was written for lgbt_fest, to the following prompt:  
> _Prompt: 494. Baby-Sitters Club, Stacey McGill, maybe it's the way she looks, maybe it's the way she dresses, but the first three times Stacey tries to come out, no one believes her. How can she get the point across without frenching a girl in the middle of the SHS cafeteria?_

"Stacey! Stacey! Anastasia Elizabeth McGill!"

A hand shook my shoulder.

"Stacey!"

"Mmmng," I said.

"You'll be late for school!"

Somehow, Mom's words got through to me this time. My eyes opened. And that was when I remembered: today was The Day.

I groaned. Sleeping through my alarm was definitely not a good start. Not that it was surprising, really; it had taken me ages to fall asleep the night before. And now that I was awake again, the butterflies that had kept me tossing and turning the night before returned with full force.

"Stacey? Are you okay?" Mom asked nervously when she saw my face. "You're not sick, are you?"

Mom tends to get nervous like that, because I've had diabetes since I was eleven years old, and it's put me in hospital a few times. That definitely wasn't the problem today, however. I made myself smile.

"I'm fine, Mom," I said. "I promise."

Mom looked at me with concern for a moment longer before she bent down to drop a kiss on my forehead. "Alright, honey," she said. "Just get yourself ready quickly, okay?"

I nodded and swung my legs off the bed. "I will."

Mom left my room, and I jumped to my feet and started brushing my hair in preparation for my shower. I realized that her concern for my health had actually helped me--I might find it annoying sometimes that she worries about me so much, but today, it reminded me that I'd been taking care of my insulin levels and giving myself injections for five years now. If I could handle that--well then surely I could handle anything. Today would be a breeze.

I showered quickly, and took care of my insulin. When I was done with that, I did my make-up and put on the new outfit I'd bought the last time I visited Dad in New York: a tight black long-sleeved T-shirt with these cute little silver spangles on the left shoulder, and a plaid mini-skirt which I wore over a pair of black tights. For my feet, I had a pair of dark red high-top sneakers, which matched my skirt, and I pulled my blonde hair up into a sleek pony-tail.

I examined my reflection in the mirror and decided that there was no doubt about it: I looked hot.

As I made my way downstairs, I knew that I was ready.

I caught Mom just as she was about to head out for work, which wasn't ideal, but I wasn't going to let that stop me.

"Mom," I said, in as strong a voice as possible, "there's something I need to tell you."

"What's that, honey?" she asked distractedly, rifling through her handbag.

"Mom," I said again, and this time she looked up at me. I made sure I caught her eye before I continued. "Mom--I--Ilikegirls," I said in a rush. And then, because I knew Mom couldn't have understood that, I said more slowly, "I like girls."

Mom cocked her head to the side. "What do you mean, Stacey?"

I took a deep breath. "I'm bisexual," I said. "I like dating boys... but I want to date girls, too."

For a moment, Mom looked stunned, but then she smiled at me, and I thought that everything was going to be okay. She stepped forward and placed a hand on my cheek.

"Oh, honey," she said. "You know that you don't need to do this just to get boys' attention, don't you?"

My mouth fell open. "_What_!?" I said, at last.

Mom sighed, and her hand fell to my shoulder. "Look, Stacey," she said, "I know that a lot of girls go through phases like this, but I've known you your whole life. I would've realized if you were--well, you know--"

"If I was what?"

Mom closed her eyes for a moment; I could tell that she was counting to ten. "How about we discuss this tonight, Stacey?" she said. "I _know_ you. You're a beautiful girl, and you don't need to pretend to be something you're not just to make boys like you."

"But--" I said, "that's not--I'm not--"

"Stacey, sweetheart, I really need to get to work," Mom said, cutting me off. "I promise, we'll talk later."

She kissed me on the cheek and was out the door before I had the chance to say another word.

I stared after her for a few seconds, trying to take in her reaction. I'd spent a bit of time wondering what I'd do if Mom became angry or upset when I told her, even though I'd been pretty sure that she wouldn't kick me out of the house or anything. But I'd never considered that maybe she just wouldn't believe me.

I seemed to have a lump in my throat, and I swallowed hard as I made my way back into the kitchen. I ate my breakfast quickly, making up for the time I'd lost by sleeping through my alarm, and set off on the walk to school.

As usual, half way to school, I met Charlotte Johanssen. I used to baby-sit for Charlotte all the time when I was a member of the Baby-Sitters' Club, and even though Charlotte was eleven now and didn't need a sitter, we were still very close; almost like sisters. When I'd planned my day--my Big Coming Out Day--I'd imagined that Charlotte would be the second person I told, after Mom. After all, I knew that Dr. Johanssen, Charlotte's Mom, kept a little rainbow flag in her office, so that all her patients could see that she didn't discriminate, and Charlotte's whole family had gone to Hartford a few years ago when her two uncles had gotten married. I thought that Charlotte would be just fine with it.

After the way that Mom had reacted, however, I wasn't so sure anymore. What if Charlotte didn't believe me either?

So, when I saw Charlotte, I just smiled at her and asked her about how her latest science project was going. We chatted away about that for a while, and then Charlotte complimented me on my new clothes, and I told her a bit about my favorite new store in New York. I wondered what Dr. Johanssen would say if I invited Charlotte to come to New York with me for a weekend--I thought she was old enough now.

By the time we parted ways out front of Stoneybrook Middle School, I was feeling a lot better. I hadn't come out to Charlotte, but when she waved goodbye to me, I realized that I'd been silly not to, and I promised myself that I'd phone her in the evening and tell her then. I walked the rest of the way to Stoneybrook High School with a smile on my face.

The next person I wanted to tell was Claudia Kishi, my best friend, but that was going to have to wait. This week, Claud's art class was painting a mural at the Community Art Center, so she'd be spending her first period of the day down town, and because she and I didn't share too many classes any more, I knew I wouldn't be able to see her until lunch.

The morning seemed to drag on forever. It seemed like time was moving in slow motion. I kept trying to remember how good it would feel once I'd told Claudia and Charlotte, and trying to forget about my Mom's response. Mr Peters called me out for daydreaming in Social Studies, and I don't think I did any better than a C on the pop quiz in Chem.

Finally--finally, the bell for lunch period rang. I quickly dumped my books in my locker, and made my way to the cafeteria, where I found Claudia at our usual table. Thankfully, we were the first ones there--at least I wouldn't have to drag her away from everyone else.

"I have something to tell you," I said, as soon as I sat down.

"Oh?" Claud looked up from her lunch. Her home-made papier-mâché earrings dangled back and forth.

"I'm--I'm--" Suddenly the words wouldn't come.

"Oh my God." Claudia's eyes widened. "You're pregnant."

I couldn't help it--I burst out laughing. Talk about ironic.

"Okay, looks like I was wrong there," said Claudia with a grin. "What's up?"

I took a minute to get myself under control again. "I'm bi, Claudia."

"Huh?"

"You know, bisexual."

For a moment, Claudia was completely silent. Then she shook her head. "No. Way."

"Yes way," I said.

"But--" Claudia seemed to struggle. "You're so boy-crazy."

"Sheesh," I said, my stomach sinking. "You're talking like we're thirteen again."

"Still," said Claudia, "You have had a few boyfriends. And, you know, well... you went all the way with Phil last year, and--"

"That doesn't mean I can't like girls too," I said quietly.

"Yeah, but--" Claudia broke off as Cassie Sellers and Tonya Green arrived with their lunch trays.

I caught Claudia's eye. "Let's talk about this later, okay?"

Claudia nodded, and then launched into a conversation with Cassie and Tonya about the party we'd attended on the weekend. I tried to speak up often enough that Cassie and Tonya wouldn't suspect anything was up, but it was hard to keep focused on their conversation about who had hooked up with whom, and Alan Gray's drunken attempts to ride a unicycle.

It didn't take long to sink in that Claudia hadn't believed me either. I began to wonder if I really had been fooling myself... but deep down, I knew that I wasn't. I knew how I felt when I looked at women, when I caught someone's eye and she smiled, and brushed her hair back just so... it's just that no one seemed to believe that I could actually feel that way. I wondered if I'd have more luck if I just frenched a girl in the middle of the SHS cafeteria. Then _everyone_ would know, and no one would be able to say I was just kidding around.

Well, except--I remembered Mom's response. They'd probably think I was just doing it for attention. Because it was another way to get boys to notice me.

Suddenly, I really didn't want to be in the cafeteria anymore.

"I need to get ready for my next class," I said, standing up. "I didn't finish all my homework last night."

I left the table as quickly as possible. Cassie and Tonya gave me strange looks, but Claudia looked a little worried. I didn't have time to deal with that now though. I wanted to be on my own.

I stopped by my locker to pick up my books for AP Math, and made my way to Ms Choi's classroom, which was blessedly empty. I'd lied about not doing my homework, but I decided that I'd tackle a couple of problems anyway. That's one of the things I love about math--you can always find an answer, if you know the right way to approach the problem.

I'd barely started on the first equation, however, when I felt my cell phone vibrate inside my handbag. Technically, we're not allowed to keep our phones turned on inside the school building, but most of the teachers were willing to look the other way so long as we kept them on silent and didn't use them during class. And besides, it's not like there was anyone here to see me.

I picked up the phone quickly, without even looking at the caller ID. "Hello?"

"Stacey?"

"Dad?" I said. It was _very_ unusual for my workaholic father to call me during business hours. "Has something happened? Is everything okay?"

Dad chuckled, but I thought he sounded a bit nervous. "Nothing's happened," he said.

"Then what's up?"

There was a pause. "I had a phone call from your mother this morning."

_Uh-oh_. "Oh," I said.

"Stacey..." said Dad. "Is there something you want to tell me?"

"If you're calling at this time of day," I said, "I think it means that Mom's already told you."

"I'd rather hear it from you."

I sighed. "Fine. I'm bi. I like girls."

"There's no need to take that tone with me, Anastasia."

"Sorry," I said. "It's just I didn't want--"

"Look," Dad interrupted me, "you know I'll always love you, right?"

"I know, Dad."

"It's just--I know I haven't always been the best father. I haven't always been there when you've needed me."

"Dad--"

"I just can't help but feel like this is my fault."

"It's not a _fault_, Dad!" I exploded. "There's nothing wrong with me, and until a second ago, there was nothing wrong with you, either."

"Stacey," he said, "I know you're upset, but just listen. I just--I don't want you to go saying these things about yourself just because you want me to notice you more."

"What in the world makes you think that this is about you?" My voice trembled.

"Anastasia, please."

I was saved from having to respond by the bell ringing. "Class is starting now, Dad," I said. "I need to go."

I ended the call without even waiting for him to say goodbye, and then I switched my phone off completely.

As other kids started to file into the classroom, I tried to hold my back straight and act like everything was normal. I saw Kristy Thomas giving me an odd look as she took her seat in front of me, but I pretended not to notice. But, for all of that, I couldn't get Dad's voice out of my head. He thought I was just making it up too, as though I was a little kid acting out in order to get her parents' attention.

I clamped my jaw down tightly, but that didn't stop tears from welling up in my eyes. I knew suddenly that there was no way to avoid it: I was going to cry. And I had no intention of doing it in front of the rest of the class.

I left all my books open on my desk, and ran from the room, pushing my way past an astonished Ms Choi. I ran all the way down the corridor to the girls' bathroom, and locked myself in one of the stalls, so that the two sophomores still fixing their makeup in the mirror wouldn't see. And then, finally, I let the tears flow. When I heard the two sophomores leave the room, I let myself sob a little, until I heard the bathroom door swing open again.

"Stacey?"

I froze.

"Stacey, it's me, Kristy."

I wiped at my eyes, and steeled myself for a moment before I opened the door and stepped out of the cubicle. "Hi, Kristy," I said shakily.

Kristy looked at me. "You look terrible," she said flatly. Kristy had never been particularly tactful. She was right though, I saw, when I looked in the mirror.

"Yeah," I said, with a hiccup. "I do."

"Ms Choi sent me to find you," Kristy told me. "She was worried that you're sick."

I wiped at my eyes again. "Not really," I said. "It's just--"

"Bad day?"

I nodded. "You must think I'm silly," I said. Kristy hardly ever cried.

Kristy snorted. "I'm Mary Anne Spier's best friend, Stacey," she said. "Of course I don't think you're being silly."

In spite of my tears, I smiled, remembering the way that Mary Anne would cry at commercials for toilet paper and pet food.

"Do you want to tell me what's wrong?" Kristy said, in a business-like tone.

I started to shake my head, because after all, Kristy and I hadn't really been that close since the Baby-Sitters' Club disbanded, but something stopped me. "Actually..." I said.

And then I was telling Kristy everything--that I was bi, about Mom thinking I wanted attention from boys and about not being able to tell Charlotte. I told her that Claudia hadn't believed me, and I told her all about Dad's phone call.

"Wow," said Kristy, when I was finished. "That sucks."

I nodded. "Yeah," I agreed.

"Well..." Kristy shrugged. "For what it's worth, I believe you."

I smiled at her. "Thanks," I said. And then I pulled her into a hug. A moment later, I felt her hug me back.

When we pulled apart, Kristy looked at me quizzically. "How long have you known about it?" she said. "Er, if that's okay to ask."

I found that I didn't mind. "Since last summer," I told her. "When I did that fashion course in New York for two weeks, I met a girl there, and we..." I blushed.

"You hit it off."

"Yeah. Anyway, I just realized then that I'd always kind of felt that way about girls, it's just that... well, I was _supposed_ to like boys, you know, so that's what I focused on. Liking girls, that was just, well, just a _thing_. I didn't realize it meant anything, until I met Duena in July."

Kristy nodded slowly. "That makes sense," she said, picking a piece of lint off her turtle-neck sweater. "Are you still seeing her?"

"Sort of," I said. "I mean... we weren't sure we wanted to... but we kept in touch, and she's going to come and visit me in Stoneybrook sometime." I paused. "I was--I was thinking about asking her to go to prom with me."

Kristy grinned. "That would be great!"

"It would." I nodded. "Except that everyone would probably refuse to believe we were there as _dates_."

"They'll come around," Kristy said.

I sighed. "I hope so." But I found that I did feel better about things. At least _someone_ believed me now.

Looking at Kristy, I remembered some rumors that had circulated during our freshman year, when Cokie Mason had decided that Kristy was a lesbian because she always wore jeans and a baseball cap. Kristy had just ignored it all; she never said she was or wasn't, and really, it didn't matter. Even so, Kristy knew what it was like to be judged by her appearance just as much as I did. Maybe that was why she was prepared to believe me when everyone else didn't.

Didn't _yet_, I told myself. Eventually they would have to believe me; they wouldn't have a choice.

I stood in front of the mirror, washed my face and fixed my make-up. Then I turned to Kristy and grinned at her.

"Okay," I said. "Let's go back to class."


End file.
